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 Various Scriptures

INTRODUCTION: Jesus came not only to die for your sins, but also to help you with your problems. God offers you new life in Christ, and with his power you can change. Our message series is called, “Lord, I Have a Problem,” and in this series we are looking at how God helps you with your problems. Last week we talked about anger. Today we are talking about envy. How does God help you with the problem of envy? (Read James 3:13-16 and pray.)

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So how does God help you with the problem of envy? Before we learn how to deal with envy, first we need to look at the problem itself.

I. The problem of envy

Envy is an especially big problem in life, both for believers and non-believers. In fact, I don’t know if there is any other sin quite like it. Shakespeare dubbed it, “the green-eyed monster which doth mock the meat it feeds on” (Othello 3:iii). Chaucer called it a “foul sin … the worst of sins” because it is “against all virtues and against every manner of goodness” (The Parson’s Tale). This is one bad sin, and so we need to take a closer look at the problem of envy.

   A. Part of original sin (Satan; Eve; Romans 1:29; 1 Peter 2:1)

First, envy was part of original sin in this world. Pride was a big part of it too, but envy was right there alongside. Both Satan in heaven, and Eve in the garden gave in to the sin of envy. Satan wanted to be like God, and Satan’s temptation to Eve in the garden was, “You will be like God.”

Envy was part of original sin in the world, and so it’s no wonder it makes a regular appearance in the various “sin lists” in the Bible. For example, Romans 1:29 says: “They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice.” 1 Peter 2:1 says: “Therefore, rid yourselves of all malice and all deceit, hypocrisy, envy, and slander of every kind.”

   B. Draws you away from God (John 5:44; 1 Corinthians 3:1-3)

Secondly, envy draws you away from God. Jesus said: “How can you believe if you accept praise from one another, yet make no effort to obtain the praise that comes from the only God?” (John 5:44). Envy draws you away from God to look for the praise that comes from other people rather than the praise that comes from God, which is the only praise that really matters.

As a result, envy stunts your spiritual growth. Paul told the believers at Corinth: “Brothers, I could not address you as spiritual but as worldly—mere infants in Christ.… For since there is jealousy and quarreling among you, are you not worldly? Are you not acting like mere men?” (1 Cor. 3:1-3). Envy draws you away from God, and it keeps you a spiritual infant in the kingdom of God.

   C. Makes you miserable (Proverbs 14:30)

Not only that, but envy also makes you miserable. The book of Proverbs says: “A heart at peace gives life to the body, but envy rots the bones” (Prov. 14:30). Now, all sin will make you miserable eventually. But the sin of envy makes you miserable right from the start.

Most other sins provide at least some kind of gratification at the beginning. That’s why we’re tempted to sin. But not envy. Envy makes you miserable all the way through from beginning to end. When we envy, we fail to praise God for the good we see in others, and we fail to be thankful for our own blessings. Envy steals your joy and robs God’s glory, and that’s a big problem.

   D. Leads to other sins (James 3:16; Mark 15:10)

Envy also leads to other sins. James 3:16 says: “For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice.” Envy leads to a whole host of other problems and sins. Envy is the cause of broken relationships, lack of community, arguments and even wars. It was envy that led to the greatest sin of all—putting Jesus to death on the cross. The Bible says: “It was out of envy that the chief priests had handed Jesus over to him” (Mark 15:10).

   E. Can keep you out of heaven (Galatians 5:19-21)

Envy can also keep you out of heaven. Galatians 5 says: “The acts of the sinful nature are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God” (Gal. 5:19-21). Envy got Satan thrown out of heaven, and envy will also keep many people from entering the kingdom of heaven.

   F. Ultimately destructive (Job 5:2)

Finally, envy is ultimately destructive. Job 5:2 puts it plainly: “Resentment kills a fool, and envy slays the simple.” So, if you want to participate in the original sin that led to all other sins, if you want to be drawn away from God, if you want to make yourself miserable, if you want to open yourself up to all sorts of other sins, if you want to live in a way that is ultimately self destructive and can even keep you out of heaven, then envy is your ticket to ride. But there is a better way, and God wants to help you with the problem of envy in your life.

II. Understanding envy

So, what exactly is envy? We’ve seen that envy is a big problem, but we need to take some time to really understand this sin before we can learn how to deal with it in our lives.

   A. Envy and jealousy (Proverbs 27:4)

First of all, let’s talk about the difference between envy and jealousy. Envy and jealousy are similar. The words are often used interchangeably, and yet there is still a subtle difference between the two. Envy is desiring something that someone else has. Jealousy is not wanting someone else to have what you have. Envy says, “I want what you’ve got!” Jealousy says, “Stay away from what I’ve got!” Envy is marked by covetousness. Jealousy is marked by possessiveness. Envy makes you resentful. Jealousy makes you territorial.

Envy is when I want to play guitar as good as you do. Jealousy is when I don’t want you to play guitar as good as I do. Envy is when you wish you had a husband like your friend’s husband. Jealousy is when you don’t want anyone messing with your own husband. As such, jealousy is a powerful emotion. Proverbs 27:4 says: “Anger is cruel and fury overwhelming, but who can stand before jealousy?”

   B. Godly jealousy

Now just as we learned last week that there is such a thing as righteous anger, there is also such a thing as godly jealousy. So, just like anger, jealousy is not necessarily a sin.

      1) God (Exodus 34:14; Deut 32:16; 1 Corinthians 6:19; James 4:5)

For example, God is jealous, but in a good way. God says in Exodus 34: “Do not worship any other god, for the LORD, whose name is Jealous, is a jealous God” (Ex. 34:14). We read in Deuteronomy 32: “They made him jealous with their foreign gods and angered him with their detestable idols” (Deut. 32:16).

God is jealous for your worship and affections because your worship and affections rightfully belong to him. 1 Corinthians 6 says: “Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own” (1 Cor. 6:19).

When you become a Christian, you belong to God in a new way because the Holy Spirit comes to dwell within you. That’s why the book of James says: “Or do you think Scripture says without reason that the spirit he caused to live in us envies intensely?” (James 4:5). That’s how much God loves you! He loves you with a godly jealousy.

      2) for God (Psalm 119:136; Acts 17:16; Matt 6:9-10)

God is not the only one who can exercise godly jealousy. We can also exercise a godly jealousy for God. We see this when the psalmist says in Psalm 119: “Streams of tears flow from my eyes, for your law is not obeyed” (Ps. 119:136). The psalmist looked around at the culture, he saw people disobeying God’s law, and he was so jealous for God’s honor that tears streamed from his eyes. The apostle Paul felt a godly jealousy when he visited the city of Athens. We read in Acts 17: “While Paul was waiting for them in Athens, he was greatly distressed to see that the city was full of idols” (Acts 17:16). Paul was jealous for God’s honor and glory.

We exercise a godly jealousy for God every time we pray the Lord’s Prayer and mean it: “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven” (Matt. 6:9-10). In that prayer we are praying for God’s name to be honored, for God’s kingdom and will to be done. We are jealous for God’s glory and honor. It is a godly jealousy.

      3) for other believers (2 Corinthians 11:2-3)

As Christians we can also exercise a godly jealousy for other believers. Paul wrote to the Corinthians: “I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him. But I am afraid that just as Eve was deceived by the serpent’s cunning, your minds may somehow be led astray from your sincere and pure devotion to Christ” (2 Cor. 11:2-3) Paul was jealous for them in a good way. He was jealous over the possibility that they might be led away from Christ and away from a pure devotion to Jesus.

      4) in marriage (Song of Solomon 8:6)

Marriage is another place where we can exercise godly jealousy. We read these stirring words in the Song of Solomon: “Place me like a seal over your heart, like a seal on your arm; for love is as strong as death, its jealousy unyielding as the grave. It burns like blazing fire, like a mighty flame” (Song 8:6). It is right for a husband or wife to be jealous of their spouse, because you rightfully belong to each other. Now, it’s not right to be jealous without reason. But a husband should guard his relationship with his wife, and a wife should guard her relationship with her husband.

So, there is such a thing as godly jealousy. Notice, however, that there is no such thing as godly envy. God is jealous for that which rightfully belongs to him. But he is never envious of anything that you or I have. God doesn’t want your iPhone.

   C. Sinful envy and jealousy

Unfortunately, just as we are more familiar with sinful anger than righteous anger, so we are more familiar with sinful envy and jealousy than godly jealousy. So, what are the ways that sinful envy and jealousy manifest themselves? Let me share with you six main ways.

      1) sibling rivalry (Cain and Abel; Jacob and Esau; etc.)

One common way is through sibling rivalry. And sibling rivalry does not just mean when you are a kid. Many of us struggle with sibling rivalry all the way through our adult years as well.

The Bible lists a long line of brothers and sisters who struggled with sibling rivalry. Cain and Abel, Jacob and Esau, Joseph and his brothers all struggled with sibling rivalry. Aaron and Miriam were jealous of Moses. Jesus’ brothers were jealous of Jesus (see Gen. 4:1-6, 37:4; Num. 11:28-30; Acts 7:9; John 7:5). It seems no one is exempt.

It’s been said, “Sibling rivalry is inevitable. The only sure way to avoid it is to have one child” (Nancy Samalin). And even though sibling rivalry may be inevitable—parents, so much of it is preventable. Why did Joseph’s brothers envy Joseph? The Bible tells us: “When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him” (Gen. 37:4). Later on, we read: “Because [they] were jealous of Joseph, they sold him as a slave into Egypt” (Acts 7:9). Parents, do your best to love and treat your children equally, and you will go a long way towards lessening the poison of sibling rivalry.

      2) professional jealousy (1 Samuel 18:8-9)

Another common example of sinful envy is what we call professional jealousy. Professional jealousy is when you are envious or jealous of someone who does the same type of work as you do. Tradesmen, salesmen, doctors, lawyers, preachers, mothers—any of us can struggle with professional jealousy.

King Saul struggled with professional jealousy when David outdid him on the battlefield. When the women danced in the streets singing about how Saul killed thousands, but David killed tens of thousands, we read: “Saul was very angry … ‘They have credited David with tens of thousands,’ he thought, ‘but me with only thousands. What more can he get but the kingdom?’ And from that time on Saul kept a jealous eye on David” (1 Sam. 18:8-9).

      3) comparing and coveting (Ecclesiastes 4:4; Proverbs 14:10; Galatians 6:4)

Another way we participate in sinful envy is through coveting and comparing. The advertising world doesn’t do us any favors when it comes to coveting. Have you ever noticed that they never just advertise products? Rather, they advertise people enjoying products. If they just showed you the product they might get you on greed. But if they show you the person enjoying the product, they can get you on envy. Apparently envy makes a whole lot more money than greed.

King Solomon observed: “I saw that all labor and all achievement spring from man’s envy of his neighbor. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind” (Eccl. 4:4). We all fall into this trap at one time or another. The writer Gore Vidal once confessed very honestly, “Whenever a friend succeeds, a little something in me dies.” John McGowan writes, “Don’t waste time on comparison—it only leads to pride or discouragement.”

One of the problems with coveting and comparing is that you can never truly compare yourself to another person. You don’t really know what they’re going through. Proverbs 14:10 says: “Each heart knows its own bitterness, and no one else can share its joy.” You can only compare yourself to what you think you know about the other person. The truth is, you’re only comparing yourself to phantoms in your own mind, not real people with real problems that you know nothing about.

Comparing is a trap and an illusion. We waste so much time wishing we could be someone else, especially when that person is probably wishing they could be someone else too. They might even be wishing they were you, and you’re both envying each other. That’s why the Bible says: “Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else” (Gal. 6:4). Or as another person put it: “Be yourself, because everyone else is taken!”

      4) evil thoughts towards others (Proverbs 24:17)

Sinful envy also manifests itself in evil thoughts towards others. When you are envious or jealous, you can think some pretty terrible things about other people. Proverbs 24:17 tells us: “Do not gloat when your enemy falls; when he stumbles, do not let your heart rejoice.” Oh, how we need to repent of this sin of envy and ask God for forgiveness.

      5) envying the wicked (Psalm 37:1-4)

A fifth way we can practice sinful envy or jealousy is when we envy the wicked. Here you are trying to live a good life for God, and you feel like you are getting nowhere, and lo and behold, these people who care nothing about God seem to be doing so much better than you! God addresses this kind of envy in Psalm 37: “Do not fret because of evil men or be envious of those who do wrong; for like the grass they will soon wither, like green plants they will soon die away. Trust in the Lord and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the Lord and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Ps. 37:1-4).

      6) causing others to envy (2 Corinthians 12:5-6; Galatians 5:26)

And then finally a sixth way we can sin in this area of envy and jealousy is by causing others to envy. Can anyone say, “Christmas letters?” You know, those letters where people tell you all about the wonderful vacations they took or how great their kids are all doing? Or how about Facebook posts? Do we ever post things that make us look good in hopes that others will envy us and how we are doing? Does anyone ever post a bad selfie?

Now there’s nothing wrong with writing Christmas letters or Facebook posts sharing about good things that are happening in your life, but you need to watch your motives, and you need to be careful that you are not intentionally causing others to envy.

The apostle Paul was very careful about this. He wrote: “I will not boast about myself, except about my weaknesses. Even if I should choose to boast, I would not be a fool, because I would be speaking the truth. But I refrain, so no one will think more of me than is warranted by what I do or say” (2 Cor. 12:5-6).

Galatians 5:26 says: “Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other.” Envy is a sin, but so is provoking others to envy. We need to be more careful about what we share, why we share, how we share it and who we share it with.

III. Dealing with envy

We have looked at the problem of envy. We have delved more deeply into our understanding of envy. So now, how do we deal with this problem of envy in our lives? Let me share with you five ways God can help you deal with envy in your life.

   A. Confess it as sin (James 3:14)

First and foremost, confess it as sin. James 3:14 says: “If you harbor bitter envy and selfish ambition in your hearts, do not boast about it or deny the truth.” If you struggle with envy, don’t boast about it or deny it. Instead, confess it to God and receive his forgiveness through Jesus.

   B. Accept your calling (Acts 17:26; Psalm 75:6-7)

Number two, accept your calling. The book of Acts says: “From one man God made every nation of men, that they should inhabit the whole earth; and he determined the times set for them and the exact places where they should live” (Acts 17:26). We’re going to talk more about this when we discuss self-image in a few weeks, but for right now, realize that God put you where you are and gave you the gifts you have for a reason. And the sooner you accept your particular calling instead of always wanting to be someone else, the sooner you can leave envy in the dust and find all the good things God has for you right where you are.

Psalm 75 says: “No one from the east or the west or from the desert can exalt a man. But it is God who judges: He brings one down, he exalts another” (Ps. 75:6-7). R. T. Kendall rightly comments on this verse: “When I am jealous of those who are successful, admired, mightily used, elevated, promoted rather than me, and more popular, I am really angry with God” (R. T. Kendall).

When you find yourself envying someone, understand that it’s not really about them. Your argument is really with God. Frederick Bruner writes, “The best antidote to envy is the conviction of the sovereignty of God,” and that comes with accepting your calling.

   C. Love God and others (Matt. 22:37-39; 1 Cor. 13:4; Rom. 12:15)

Number three: love God and love other people. Jesus called this the greatest commandment: “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.… And love your neighbor as yourself” (Matt. 22:37-39). 1 Corinthians 13 says: “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy” (1 Cor. 13:4). Romans 12 tells us: “Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn” (Rom. 12:15). Love looks for the good in the other person and rejoices in it rather than resents it. When you love God and neighbor, there is no room for envy.

   D. Be content in Christ (Philippians 4:12-13)

Number four: Be content in Christ. Paul wrote in Philippians: “I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength” (Phil. 4:12-13). Find your contentment in Christ and be thankful for the gifts God has given you. Contentment and thankfulness will go a long way towards combating envy in your life.

   E. The fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23)

And then finally, just like last week, we end with the fruit of the Spirit. Only as the Holy Spirit changes your character from within will you finally have victory in this area. The fruit of love, joy, peace, and self-control are especially applicable to the sin of envy.

CONCLUSION: Envy is a particularly nasty problem. Envy robs God of his glory and you of your joy. But Jesus came to help you with your problems. Ask him to help you with the problem of envy today.

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Some helpful resources for dealing with envy:

Envy: A Big Problem You Didn’t Know You Had, by Mike Fabarez

The Envy of Eve, by Melissa B. Kruger

Jealousy-The Sin No One Talks about: How to Overcome Envy and Live a Life of Freedom, by R.T. Kendall

Respectable Sins, by Jerry Bridges

The Seven Deadly Sins Today, by Henry Fairlie

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© Ray Fowler

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By Ray Fowler. © Ray Fowler. Website: https://www.rayfowler.org

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