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1 Thessalonians 4:1-8

INTRODUCTION: Our message series is called “Lessons from a Growing Church,” and as we come to chapter four, we reach a major transition point in the letter. In fact, you can divide the entire book of 1 Thessalonians into two sections: chapters 1-3 and chapters 4-5.

Up to this point Paul has largely been talking with the Thessalonians about past events. Now he turns his attention to the present and the future. Paul also shifts from a narrative style to one of direct instruction and exhortation. This is common for Paul’s letters. He often begins with narrative or doctrine and then moves onto direct commands.

And so, in chapters 4-5 we find a variety of instructions. God instructs us how to worship and fellowship together. God speaks to us about the return of Christ and about those who have already died. He gives us direction concerning our daily work habits. And, he even pries into our sex lives. “How dare he!” you ask. Well, he is God. And so, he can pretty much do what he wants.

But the good news is that everything God does, he does because he loves you and wants the very best for you. God is on your side, and you do well to pay attention to his commands. (Read 1 Thessalonians 4:1 and pray.)

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Do you desire to please God … in all areas of your life? Paul gets real personal with us here because he gives us God’s instructions concerning a very personal part of our lives. In our passage today we find specific instruction concerning our sexual behavior and conduct.

We live in a country that is obsessed with sex. Sex saturates the media. It propels the advertising industry and captivates the minds of countless millions every day. You cannot drive down I-95 or check out your groceries at the counter without being confronted with billboards or magazines which in some way communicate about sex.

Now, there is nothing wrong with sex in and of itself. God created us as sexual beings and sex is supposed to be an important part of our lives. However, when we ignore God’s commands concerning sex, we only end up hurting ourselves and other people. If we want to please God in all areas of our life, then we need to know what God requires of us in the area of sexual behavior.

We hear a whole lot today about the importance of practicing “safe sex.” Well, in our passage today, God tells us how to practice “sanctified sex.” How do you live in order to please God in the whole area of sexuality? As Christians we please God sexually by practicing “sanctified sex.” So, let’s look at our passage now and see what this “sanctified sex” is all about.

I. We should live to please God (1-2)

Verses 1-2 set the stage by giving us the overall context for our passage. And that context is a commitment to please God in all areas of your life. These first two verses really serve as an introduction to rest of the letter where we are given specific instructions on how to please God in a variety of areas in our lives. Look at verses 1-2 with me now:

Finally, brothers, we instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you are living. Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more. 2 For you know what instructions we gave you by the authority of the Lord Jesus. (1 Thessalonians 4:1-2)

Notice that Paul says, “we instructed you.” Paul is not teaching them anything new here. He is simply reminding them of what he has already told them. The Thessalonians didn’t need any new revelation from God. They simply needed to obey the commands they had already received.

What had Paul instructed them? He had instructed them “how to live in order to please God.” Paul uses a series of present tense verbs here which indicates that he is talking about a lifestyle, a conscious choice to live in a manner that is consistently pleasing to God, rather than just occasional acts of obedience.

There is a way to live which pleases God, and there is a way to live which displeases God. God has given us guidelines. He has laid out the path for us. It is important that you know not only how to become a Christian, but also how to live the Christian life. Paul did not merely share the gospel with the Thessalonians. He also taught them how to live in order to please God. As Christians, that should be our aim in life. We live not to please ourselves, or other people, but God. We saw this back in 2:4 when Paul said he was not trying to please men, but God, who tests our hearts.

Notice that Paul also encourages the Thessalonians. He tells them, “We instructed you how to live in order to please God, as in fact you are living.” The Thessalonians were not living lives of radical disobedience. Their faith was strong, they were sharing the gospel, they were loving each other. They were already living in ways that were pleasing to God. But there is always room for growth, so Paul says, “Now we ask you and urge you in the Lord Jesus to do this more and more.”

The words translated “do so more and more” literally mean to abound or overflow.” It is the same word we saw for “overflow” back in 3:12. God does not demand perfection from us, but rather progression. We will never reach perfection in this life, but God expects that we will grow in holiness, that we will live to please him more and more as we go through life.

The word translated “instructions” is a stronger word than you might guess from the translation. It literally means “charges, or commands.” This was a military term used for the commands given by a superior officer to a soldier under his command. You know in the military they don’t make suggestions, right? “Private, what do you think about doing twenty pushups? No? It’s alright, don’t worry about it, it was only a suggestion.” No, in the military you issue commands, and those commands must be obeyed immediately, completely, precisely. These commands Paul gives are “by the authority of the Lord Jesus.” These are not Paul’s ideas or commands. They come directly from the Lord Jesus himself. They carry divine authority.

And so, Paul sets the context for practicing “sanctified sex.” It is not a matter of legalism, asceticism or pride. It is a matter of living to please God. Verse one presents the positive goal for following these instructions: we seek to please God in all areas of our life. Verse two presents the authority behind these instructions: they are God’s commands given by the authority of Jesus Christ.

II. We should practice sanctified sex (3-6)

Next, Paul takes this general command that we should live to please God and applies it to our sexual relationships. And in the process, he tells us how to practice “sanctified sex.” Look at verses 3-6 with me now:

It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; 4 that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God; 6 and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him. (1 Thessalonians 4:3-6)

Paul states it clearly: “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified.” Most people think of God’s will in terms of the major decisions you make in life – what job to take, where to go to school, who to marry. And yes, God is concerned with those major decisions, but he is even more concerned with the way you live your life on a day-to-day basis. If you follow God’s revealed will in your day-to-day life, the rest will take care of itself. If you’re not following God’s revealed will day-to-day, how do you expect to recognize his guidance at key points in your life?

People often think of God’s will as something hidden or mysterious. There is nothing hidden or mysterious about it here. Simply put, God wants you to be holy. God’s great, over-riding interest in your life is not your bank account, your success, or even your happiness. His great concern is your sanctification. God wants to make you holy. And if you are a Christian, he will do whatever it takes to get you there. The word “sanctification” means to be set apart, dedicated, consecrated for God and his purposes. Here it speaks of your personal growth in holiness.

Notice how Paul moves from the general to the specific in this passage. “Living to please God” back in verses 1-2 – that’s very general. Next, Paul speaks of God’s will for your life. Well, that’s a little more specific. Then he defines an important aspect of God’s will for your life, your sanctification. That’s a little more specific. But now Paul gets even more specific. He talks about one particular area of sanctification that was crucial for the Thessalonians and is also crucial for us today. He gets down to the nitty-gritty of what it means to practice “sanctified sex.”

And he gives us three instructions here: 1) Avoid sexual immorality. 2) Learn to practice self-control. 3) Treat each other with honor and respect.

   A. Avoid sexual immorality (3)

First of all, avoid sexual immorality. The word translated “avoid” here means “to abstain or refrain.” As Christians we must make a clean cut with sexual immorality. We mustn’t make any room for it in our lives We must abstain from it completely.

The Greek word for sexual immorality here is “porneia.” This is the general word for all types of sexual immorality – whether premarital, extramarital, homosexual, prostitution, incest or any kind of sexual sin.

Sexual sin was common, even prevalent in Greek society. The Greeks viewed sexual sin as something minor, no big deal. It was overlooked and commonly accepted. The Greeks actually expected men to have sexual relations outside of marriage. Sex with slaves or prostitutes was common. It was common for the wealthier men to have a mistress. And for those who worshiped idols, sexual sin was even part of their religion.

In short, the Thessalonians lived in a sexually permissive society, and they had to make a choice between following the culture or following God’s commands. Sound familiar? We sometimes don’t realize what a huge impact the culture has on our lives. That’s because we are living in it. It is all around us. We are like the fish that doesn’t notice the water because that’s all it knows. The world constantly tries to mold you into its image. The culture assaults you relentlessly with its own values and ideas. God, however, does not accommodate his commands to culture. God still holds up the highest standards for those who belong to him. God’s word must govern your behavior, not what is culturally accepted.

Notice that Paul does not say to abstain from sex, but from sexual immorality. People sometimes get this odd idea that God is against sex or that the Bible somehow frowns upon sexual activity. Far from viewing sexuality negatively, the Bible honors and celebrates sexuality within the context of marriage. Sex is God’s idea. This was his good gift to mankind. The Bible nowhere condemns sex itself, only sexual immorality.

The Bible is realistic. The Bible teaches us that sex is one of God’s good gifts to man but also recognizes the great pain and damage sex can cause when not used properly. Think about fire for a minute. Fire can be warm, protective and intimate when you keep it in the fireplace. But let it out of the fireplace and it causes great damage. It can burn down the house or take a life. It’s the same way with sex. Sex is safe within the fireplace of marriage – warm, protective, intimate and nurturing. But take it out of the fireplace of marriage, and it will burn you every time.

So, that’s the first way you practice sanctified sex. Avoid sexual immorality. You sanctify sex by setting it apart to save and reserve for marriage.

   B. Learn to practice self-control (4-5)
      – 1 Corinthians 6:18-20

Secondly, learn to practice self-control. Look at verses 4-5 where Paul writes: “… that each of you should learn to control his own body in a way that is holy and honorable, 5 not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.” (1 Thessalonians 4:4-5)

Paul speaks here about the importance of self-control, which is a fruit of the Holy Spirit. Notice this instruction is directed to “each of you.” This is a command to each individual believer. You should each learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable.
The Bible accords great honor to your physical body. In fact, it says elsewhere that sexual sin is a special kind of sin because it is a sin against your own body. We read in 1 Corinthians 6: “Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. 19 Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20 you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.” (1 Corinthians 6:18-20)

As a Christian you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable. Paul says that this is in direct contrast with those of the world. Look at verse 5 where he says: “not in passionate lust like the heathen, who do not know God.” As a Christian you should control your desires; your desires should not control you.

When Paul speaks of the heathen, he simply means those “who do not know God.” Why does the world have such a vastly different sexual ethic than Christianity? Paul says it is because they don’t know God. In Romans 1 Paul also connects sexual immorality with a rejection of the knowledge of God.

Think about it. Sexuality is at the heart of your identity and being. We are created as sexual beings. We are brought into this world through sexuality. We equate sexuality with intimacy, and we all long for intimacy. Unfortunately, when we disobey God’s commands for sex, we cut sex off from the intimacy God intended within the security of the lifelong commitment of marriage. The true intimacy we all long for is relationship with our God and Creator. So, if we do not know God, then we naturally act out sexually.

The crux of the matter is this. Christians who do know God should act differently from those who do not. We have no excuse. We know God; we know his love for us; we know his commands. We should be different.

Sadly, some surveys indicate that Christians and non-Christians are virtually indistinguishable when it comes to moral behaviors. Although we have different beliefs, we don’t always exhibit different behavior. Christian single women have told me horrific stories of dating experiences with supposedly Christian single young men. This should not be. The world should look at Christians and see a marked difference in our lives. As Christians we must pursue a radically different sexual ethic than the world. We need to practice sanctified sex.

   C. Treat each other with honor and respect (6)

So, once again, how do you practice sanctified sex? 1) Avoid sexual immorality. 2) Learn to practice self-control. And 3) treat each other with honor and respect. Look at verse six with me now where Paul writes: “… and that in this matter no one should wrong his brother or take advantage of him.” (1 Thessalonians 4:6) Paul says that in this matter, in this whole area of sexual behavior, you should not wrong each other or take advantage of each other. In other words, you must treat each other with honor and respect.

The word translated “wrong someone” in verse six means “to transgress, to overreach; to go beyond, to exceed the proper limits.” Do you see how that applies to sexual sin? When you sin sexually with someone, you have overstepped the bounds. You have gone beyond the proper limits of your relationship with a person who is not your spouse.

Teenagers commonly ask the question, “Well, how far can you go? What is the proper limit for sexual expression?” Sadly, the world is in total moral confusion on these issues. Instead of teaching our children abstinence and the importance of saving sex for marriage, many schools and parents just pass out condoms and tell their teens to make sure they have safe, responsible sex. We have overstepped the bounds. We have exceeded the proper limits. Safe sex is not the answer. Sanctified sex is. In fact, sanctified sex is the only truly safe sex – sex within the proper limits that God has so lovingly designed, sex reserved for the security and safety of marriage.

Paul also says that you should “not take advantage” of your brother in this matter. The word translated “take advantage” means “to defraud; to claim more, to take more than one’s due.” When you sin sexually with someone, you not only overstep the boundaries. You defraud the other person. You take something that does not belong to you.

If you commit adultery, you take from the person’s spouse. If you engage in pre-marital sex, then you take from that person’s future spouse. If you live together before marriage, you take away from your own future. Studies show that couples who live together before marriage experience higher rates of divorce, marital dissatisfaction and even spousal abuse than couples who wait until marriage to live together.

Don’t defraud yourself or other people. Don’t take advantage of another person sexually. Rather, treat each other with honor and respect as God commands.

III. Four reasons why we should practice sanctified sex (6-8)

So, we have looked at the context for sanctified sex – living to please God in all areas of your life). We have seen God’s directions on how to practice sanctified sex. Now finally, Paul gives us four motivating reasons why you should follow God’s instructions in this area. Look at verses 6-8 with me now:

The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you. 7 For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. 8 Therefore, he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God, who gives you his Holy Spirit. (1 Thessalonians 4:6-8)

Notice that these reasons or warnings are not directed at the world but are specifically directed to the church. God is speaking to us here. As Christians we must practice a different sexual ethic than the world. Why? Four reasons: 1) God’s punishment, 2) God’s call, 3) God’s command, and 4) God’s gift.

   A. God’s punishment – the Lord will punish men for all such sins (6b)

The first reason is God’s punishment. Paul writes in verse 6: “The Lord will punish men for all such sins, as we have already told you and warned you.” (1 Thessalonians 4:6) The Lord will punish you for sexual sin. Literally, the verse says that “The Lord is the avenger,” that is, he is the one who does what is right and just. So, when you take advantage of someone sexually, when you defraud them or take something that does not belong to you, God is their avenger. This speaks of a present tense judgment for sin. Sexual sin brings painful consequences. Just because you are saved, do not think that you can sin without consequence. The Lord will punish men for all such sins.

Once again, this was not a new instruction for the Thessalonians. Paul had already told them and warned them about this. That word “warned” means to solemnly declare or testify. Paul had testified to the Thessalonians about God’s certain judgment for those who transgress his commands in this area.

   B. God’s call – God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life (7)

The second reason is God’s call. Paul writes in verse 7: “For God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.” (1 Thessalonians 4:7) God doesn’t want you to be motivated merely by fear of punishment. You should also be motivated to holy living by your calling.

God has called you to himself. He has called you to salvation, he has called you to heaven in the future, and he has also called you to live a holy life now in the present. That call goes all the way back to the day of your salvation. When you accept Christ as Savior, you accept all that he has for you, including salvation from sin and impurity. We are saved to be sanctified. God saves us not just to forgive us, but to make us into a new and a holy people who will one day live in the very presence of our great and holy God. God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life.

Notice that Paul says “us” here. Paul includes himself and his missionary companions in these instructions. There is no double standard here. Paul applies the same standards of behavior to himself as he does to the Thessalonians.

   C. God’s command – he who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God (8a)

The third reason is God’s command. Paul writes in verse 8: “He who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God.” (1 Thessalonians 4:8) The word “reject” here means “to hold as null and void; to do away with or set aside, to choose not to recognize.” It is a present participle signifying a settled attitude or conviction, not a random act of disobedience.

Paul says that when you consciously choose sexual immorality over God’s commands, you reject God. You refuse to recognize God, you set him aside, you consider God as of no account in your life. You’re not rejecting man. Paul is only the messenger. The message comes from God and therefore comes with God’s authority. He who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God.

   D. God’s gift – God gives you his Holy Spirit (8b)

And then the fourth reason Paul gives for obeying these commands is God’s gift. Paul writes in verse 8 that it is “God who gives you his Holy Spirit.” (1 Thessalonians 4:8) The giving of the Holy Spirit is that which defines a Christian. A Christian is not simply someone who goes to church or believes in God or even has prayed to receive Christ. A Christian is someone who has received the gift of the Holy Spirit.

When you are born of the Spirit, God’s Spirit now lives within you to draw you closer to God and give you power over indwelling sin. The verse literally says: “God who gives into you his Holy Spirit.” One translation puts it this way: “God, who offers his Holy Spirit to dwell in you.”

Paul speaks of this giving in the present tense. That’s unusual. Paul usually speaks of the Spirit as having been given in the past. Paul’s point here is that God continually gives us of his Holy Spirit in order that we may live a holy life. When you give in to impurity, you sin against God who at that very moment offers you his Holy Spirit. Paul also uses an unusual word order for Holy Spirit which emphasizes the word “holy. He is God’s Holy Spirit, and to choose immorality is to reject God’s gift.

CONCLUSION: Do you remember where we started? Do you remember the ultimate motivation behind all this? It all starts with a desire to please God. If you desire to please God, then you will want to do his will. It is God’s will that you be sanctified. Therefore, in order to please God sexually, you must practice sanctified sex. Avoid sexual immorality. Learn to practice self-control. Treat each other with honor and respect.

Why should we follow these commands? Four reasons: God’s punishment, God’s call, God’s command and God’s gift. God will punish sexual sin. God did not call us to be impure, but to live a holy life. He who rejects this instruction does not reject man but God. God gives you his Holy Spirit.

Christian commitment demands a radically different sexual ethic from the world’s. The world says, “If it feels good, do it.” Christianity says, “If it pleases God, do it. And if it displeases God, don’t.” I encourage you this morning to repent of any sexual sin in your life. Commit yourself to pleasing God in all areas of your life. Don’t do things the world’s way. Do things God’s way. Make a fresh commitment this morning to live a sanctified life and to follow God’s good rules for sanctified sex.

© Ray Fowler

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